On The Streets--"Dealing With Sorrows"

The Vietnam Veterans Memorial was dedicated in 1982. In the first 15 years, 54,000 items were left at the Wall. It still takes almost an hour every night, and much longer on Memorial Day, to collect the mementos—a teddy bear, a photo of a soldier’s grandchild, a letter from a daughter who never knew her dad.

The Wall reminds us that sorrow comes to us all. We often carry our grief around for years—struggling with our emotions. While the Wall provides a place to leave mementos—is there a place where we can truly lay down our sorrows?

The holidays bring out the best and the worst in some people. As Emergency Responders, we know about the worst all too well.

All of us will have to deal with folks during the holiday season that are at their worst. People have pain and grief in their lives that has gone unresolved and for some reason—the holidays seem to magnify the pain.

Our “customers” often try to handle the pain in ways that are neither healthy nor productive. Those who choose to use alcohol and drugs to ease their pain will use too much. The 911 center will get calls about fights, car wrecks and other bad decisions caused by too much “medication”. Some of the sights that we see over the holidays are too heart breaking to talk about.

As we take calls from hysterical people, respond to domestic situations, arrest DWI drivers and transport depressed patients to the hospital—we do our best to distance ourselves from the situation. We can’t get too personally involved—but do we understand that many of the people that we come in contact with are dealing with their sorrows and grief in ways that are “not good?”

While most of us that respond to these emergencies know that this happens to the public—do we keep a check on ourselves? Do we deal with our life struggles in a way that is productive and healthy? We know that the difficulties of life come to us all, but is there a place where we can leave our sorrows and find healing for the wounds of life?

The Old Testament book of Isaiah tells the prophecy of the coming Christ. If you go to a Christmas program you will probably hear from Isaiah 7:14—“Therefore the Lord himself will give you a sign: The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel.” You may also hear Isaiah 9:6—“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”

Immanuel means “God with us”. Another name that Isaiah tells us that Jesus will be known by is “Prince of Peace”. We always talk about peace at Christmas…but where is the peace that I need when I am dealing with the great struggles that I face?

Keep reading in Isaiah and you will come to Chapter 53. Here the prophet speaks of the Messiah as the One who came to be with us and “has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows…By His stripes we are healed” (vv4-5). When we receive Jesus Christ as our Savior from sin, we also come to know Him as the One who can lift the weight of sadness from our shoulders.

We can bring our grief to the Man of sorrows. There is help and healing and closure at the cross for the deepest pain of our hearts.

Car vs big tree on US 70

Vehicle Fire on NC 147

LETTER OF INTRODUCTION

For the past 9 ½ years I have served as an Associate Pastor at Bethesda Baptist Church in Durham and over the past 6 years I have served as Chaplain for Bethesda Fire and Rescue, also in Durham. Two years ago, I began serving as Chaplain for Durham County EMS.

During this time I sensed the Lord leading me to devote more time to chaplaincy and because of this calling I enrolled in the Biblical Counseling program at Master’s Divinity School. In July of 2007 I completed a Master of Ministry degree.

In January of 2008 I resigned from Bethesda Baptist Church in order to begin work on a new venture called Emergency Chaplains. My wife (Carter) and I believe that the Lord called us to minister to the public safety community here in Durham and we have dedicated our coming days to answer that calling.

Carter graduated with a BA in Psychology/Christian Counseling in May at Louisiana Baptist University and she will be available to work with the ministry, especially in the area of counseling females.

We are currently in the process of forming a non-profit corporation that will have 3 principle goals. Those goals are to provide pastoral care for our local public safety responders and their families, to provide chaplaincy care for the general public during a time of crisis and to provide resources and training that will facilitate this comprehensive approach to chaplaincy care in all 100 counties in North Carolina.

I would love to tell you more about our vision and how I believe that we would be an asset to your organization. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Sincerely,
Ralph Thompson

Emergency Chaplains

Purpose Statement

The purpose of Emergency Chaplains is to:

1. Provide pastoral care and counseling for employees and families of emergency service agencies


2. Provide pastoral care and short-term assistance for the general public whose lives have changed suddenly and forever due to a violent act or unexpected tragedy


3. Provide training and assistance to other counties and agencies in NC.

The primary purpose of Emergency Chaplains is to provide pastoral care and counseling for employees and families of emergency service agencies in Durham County, NC. This will include but is not limited to:

· Stress debriefing

· Job counseling, marriage and family counseling, addiction counseling

· Pre-Marital counseling, Perform weddings

· Officiate at funerals, bereavement counseling

· Offer spiritual guidance to those who desire it and to serve as a communication link between people in crisis and their own spiritual advisors.

· Get to know personnel, their families and their needs, providing an informal but professional support.

· Hospital visitation

In addition, Emergency Chaplains will also intervene in times of crisis for the general public of Durham County by providing on-the-scene pastoral care and crisis intervention in conjunction with local EMS, fire, law enforcement, and other emergency response agencies. This will be accomplished by doing the following:

· Respond as needed to the crisis scene.

· Minister to crisis victims and their families.

· Provide a communication channel between responders and crisis victims giving a positive public image.

· Follow the scene as it transitions to hospital or other locations, providing continuity for patients, victims and family members.

· Interface with other clergy, extended family, Red Cross, and other community support mechanisms to meet needs of victims.

· Provide stability for victims and personnel during crisis situations. Give direction for spiritual and emotional needs, both for victims and personnel.

The work of Emergency Chaplains will be accomplished by recruiting and training chaplains to serve on a volunteer basis. They will work in conjunction with agency chaplains that are already in place in order to provide support and resources and to give 24/7 coverage for crisis calls.

Emergency Chaplains will provide training and assistance for other counties in NC that desire to establish a similar chaplaincy program.

Resume

Rev. Ralph Edward Thompson

5116 Huxey Glenn Court

Durham, NC 27703-9293

Home Phone: 919.596.6345

OBJECTIVE
· To be obedient to the Lord Jesus Christ and to bring honor and glory to His name.

EXPERIENCE
· February 2008-present: Executive Director, Emergency Chaplains, PO Box 14762, Durham, NC 27709. Founded this ministry in order to provide chaplaincy to all public safety responder agencies in Durham County.
· June 1998-January 2008: Associate Pastor, Bethesda Baptist Church, 1914 S. Miami Blvd., Durham, NC 27703. Served as Discipleship Pastor initially and later as Pastor of Administration and Outreach. Ordained by church in 2001.
· 1995-1998: Agent, Farm Bureau Insurance, PO Box 15310, Durham, NC 27704

VOLUNTEER EXPERIENCE
· April 2008-present: Chaplain, NC State Highway Patrol, District C-7, Durham/Granville, NC and Troop C Chaplaincy Coordinator, Raleigh, NC
· November 2006-present: Adjunct Clergy, Durham Regional Hospital, Durham, NC
· December 2005-present: Chaplain, Durham County EMS, 402 Stadium Drive, Durham, NC
· January 2002-present: Chaplain, Bethesda Fire and Rescue, 1724 S. Miami Blvd, Durham, NC

EDUCATION
· M.Min., Biblical Counseling, Master’s International School of Divinity, Evansville, IN
July 2007.
· B.A., Biblical Studies, Louisiana Baptist University, Shreveport, LA, May 2002.
· A.Div., Southeastern College at Wake Forest, Wake Forest, NC, May 2001.
· A.A.S., Business Management, Danville Community College, Danville, VA, June 1983

OTHER TRAINING
· Specialized Training Certificate in Spiritual Care in Crisis Intervention awarded by International Critical Incident Stress Foundation (ICISF)
· Traumas of Law Enforcement training by Concerns of Police Survivors(C.O.P.S.)
· Certified EMT-B by NC Office of Emergency Medical Services

AFFILIATIONS
· Member, American Association of Christian Counselors
· Member, International Association of Biblical Counselors
· Member, International Critical Incident Stress Foundation
· Member, Federation of Fire Chaplains
· Member, Bethesda Ruritan Club

Public Safety Appreciation Weekend

I just spent an exhausting weekend with two of the greatest chaplains that anyone could ever know. Chaplain Tony Miano of Ten-Four Ministries was our speaker at Public Safety Appreciation Day on August 19th. We burned the candle at both ends---I'll let him tell our story. Check out his blog at http://thecenturionpapers.blogspot.com/2007/08/mission-durham-nc.html

Tony's website: http://www.tenfourministries.org/

Chaplain Tommy Neiman was also in town for part of the weekend. We spent most of the day Monday together and he did the service on Monday night at Ridgecrest Baptist.

You can learn more about Tommy's ministry at http://www.tommyneiman.com/

Watch this video

http://www.thehopeproject.com/

Hospital Visit

God gave me an awesome privilege back in January to lead a man named Bill to faith in Christ.

I went to see Bill in the hospital at the request of his son. We hit it off right away and became good friends.

One day when I went to visit Bill we began to talk about spiritual things. Morally, he was a good man but he had never surrendered his life to Christ.

As I shared the gospel with him, he began to weep over his sin. I asked Bill if he would like to have forgiveness for his sins and ask Jesus to be his savior.

When he said "yes", I told Bill that he could pray on his own to do that.

Before I could finish speaking, this 76 year old man raises his hands in the air, tears are streaming down his face and he cries out "Dear Lord Jesus, I have let you down so many times. Could you ever find it in your heart to forgive me? Please forgive me and please adopt me into your family. I want to be your child."

Bill got saved that day. 32 days later, he died---just one day after his 77th birthday.

I preached his funeral and was able to comfort the other believers with the news of Bill's salvation. That same news served as Bill's testimony and his witness to all of the unbelievers gathered that day.

Pray for the seeds of the gospel that were planted through the life, death and testimony of my friend Bill.

I only knew him for about 45 days here on earth---but we will have eternity to get to know each other!

N&O Article/ November 2006

Spiritual First Responder: Volunteer Chaplain Helps Emergency Workers Cope

Posted: November 20th, 2006 03:30 AM PDT

Yonat Shimron
News & Observer (Raleigh, North Carolina)

Nov. 17--DURHAM -- Ralph Thompson was eating a sandwich at Chick-fil-A when the call came in on the radio: altered mental status, diabetic, low blood sugar.

He rushed to his car, grabbed the spiral bound Durham County map from the rear seat, and sped to the scene.

"Ralph, you want to hold this door?" shouted Corolla Lauck, the paramedic, who spotted him as she rolled the stretcher out of the EMS truck and onto the sidewalk.

"I love it when they put me to work," said Thompson.

Every Thursday, Thompson has an emergency -- ministering to firefighters and paramedics in Durham County. It's not his main job. On other days he is the pastor of administration at Bethesda Baptist Church.

But this is Thompson's passion, his calling, as religious folk put it. Thompson's father was an assistant fire chief in the little town of Providence in Caswell County, and caring for emergency workers has been a family affair.

"Git in the truck, boy," was one of his dad's frequent orders, he says.

Five years ago, after the terrorist strikes of Sept. 11, Thompson felt compelled to minister to firefighters in a more intentional way.

"All of a sudden it came close to home," he says. "Firefighters, EMS and police saw the importance of chaplaincy in a major catastrophe."

Six months ago, Thompson added emergency medics to the list of people he offers support.

"They deal with life and death every day," says Thompson. "It's tough out there."

Thompson doesn't tell firefighters and medics what to believe. And though he carries a New Testament in his pocket, he doesn't quote Scripture. Chaplaincy, he thinks, is about relationships. He wants to be a listening ear, a friend. Usually, that means chatting up emergency workers about mundane things such as sports, the weather, their kids.

Still, there's nothing mundane about some of the issues paramedics are facing. On a Thursday last week, Thompson made a point of visiting with a paramedic whose daughter had just died, and inquiring about another who was undergoing chemotherapy for breast cancer.

Gordon Smith, a paramedic who relocated from New Orleans following Hurricane Katrina, says Thompson paid him special attention to make sure he wasn't experiencing any post-traumatic stress.

"He made sure I was OK in the head," says Smith. "He's easy to talk to and makes you feel at ease."

'I live Scripture'

There are 80 full-time EMS workers in Durham County and another 40 part-timers. Thompson makes a point of getting to know all of them, at least by name. His routine is the same. Thursday mornings he checks in at the EMS headquarters behind Durham Regional Hospital. Then he heads out to the 15 fire stations and six EMS stations across the county.

"My faith is caring for people," says Thompson, who is 45. "When I think of the ministry of Jesus on earth, he took care of people, he met people's needs. My philosophy is, I live Scripture."

Thompson's black SUV is emblazoned with the words "Fire/EMS chaplain." On his belt he packs a portable radio, two pagers and a cell phone. If he arrives at a station and the team gets a call, he jumps back into his car and heads out to the scene right behind the crew.

Once there, he opens doors and helps EMS workers carry their equipment. And though Thompson is chaplain to the emergency workers, he often helps patients and their families, too.

Once, he received a call from a paramedic at 2:30 a.m. A man had just died of a heart attack. His one remaining family member was in shock and the paramedics had to leave for another call. Could he come over stay with the family member?

Another time, a man in distress was threatening to shoot himself, and Thompson was there to minister to the man's wife in the raw moments after the suicide.

Across faiths

A calm demeanor and a low-key presence make him a favorite in a department that includes Christians, Muslims and plenty of agnostics.

"The guys are under a lot of stress," says Mike Smith, director of EMS for for Durham County. "They talk to each other a lot, but now they have a resource, too."

Thompson doesn't get paid for his job, yet like all volunteers, he's devoted. In addition to showing up one day a week, Thompson passes out magnetic cards with his cell phone number and he tells people he's available 24/7.

Thompson knows it's not always easy getting people to talk about their problems. "You don't just walk up and say, 'How you doing?' and expect them to tell you."

But he said, if you hang out long enough, there's always a point when the subject of a conversation turns, and a leading question can get people to open up.

In a conversation with Gary Witherspoon last week, the two talked about the EMS awareness class Witherspoon was going to give at a local elementary school. As they finished talking, Witherspoon told Thompson his mother was being discharged from the hospital, even though her situation was deteriorating.

Thompson made a mental note to follow up and say a prayer.

"Chaplains talk about having a ministry of presence," Thompson says. "You just go out and be there with them. Sometimes, you can't improve on silence."

Copyright (c) 2006, The News & Observer, Raleigh, N.C. Distributed by McClatchy-Tribune Business News. For reprints, email , call 800-374-7985 or 847-635-6550, send a fax to 847-635-6968, or write to The Permissions Group Inc., 1247 Milwaukee Ave., Suite 303, Glenview, IL 60025, USA.

"Put Your Money Where Your Tract Is"

Recently I was talking to a supervisor with Valet Parking at the hospital and came to find out that he was a believer in Jesus Christ. We talked about the opportunities to witness when working with the public. This young man impressed me with his desire to make Christ known to the people that he came in contact with.

I gave him one of our “Steps to Peace With God” tracts and briefly showed him how to use it like Dennis Nunn taught us during our Spiritual Awakening services back in January. My new friend (let’s call him “Parker”) was encouraged when as I told him how so many of you are using these tracts to witness on a daily basis.

The tract reminded Parker of an incident that he had with a fellow believer. It seems that a gentleman had offered this young man a tract in lieu of a tip along with the advice, “this is the best tip you will ever get.”

“That had happened before,” Parker told me, “several times”.

We laughed for a minute as we talked about how some Christians tip the people who serve them. It is a well-known fact that waiters and waitresses hate working the Sunday lunch shift because “Christians” are notoriously bad tippers and sometimes leave tracts in lieu of tips.

Anyway—our conversation turned back to valet parking and the incident of the tract tipper. “I don’t know what came over me,” Parker said, “but I handed the tract back to the man and told him that I didn’t need it.”

“But young man,” the tract tipper said, “the best tip I can give you is in this tract. It explains how you can ask Jesus Christ to be your Savior”.

Parker explained to the tipper that he accepted Christ as his Savior four years ago and that he appreciated the fact that this man wanted others to know Jesus.

“But you are going about this the wrong way,” Parker told him. “I agreed with him that ‘follow Jesus’ is the best advice we can give anyone.”

“Then I pointed at the young guys working for me,” Parker continued, “these guys have a hard time paying rent and buying baby food with advice and tracts. It takes money for that. Tips are how they make a living. If you want them to listen to you, you need to tip them—and tip them generously.”

Parker told me that he wanted to tell the man to “put his money where his mouth was” but decided to leave it at “put your money where your tract is”.

“How did ‘Mr. Tract Tipper’ take your comments?”

“Well, he put the tract back in his pocket, kind of made an ‘umph’ sound and got in his car.”

“Did he give you a tip?” I asked.

“No, he didn’t. The last I saw of him was the fish symbol on his trunk as he drove out of the parking lot.”

Remember—tip your wait people well—always. Tip especially well on Sunday after church. In restaurants, go ahead and give them 20% and round up to the next dollar. Don’t be a tightwad. You’ll never miss the money.

If you ever use a valet, give him at least a couple of bucks and thank him for serving you. If you have an opportunity to give out a tract—do that AFTER you tip—it will be better received.

About the fish on the back of your car—remember it is there when you are driving. It’s there when you drive away from the valet, too.

Tip generously. It’s your testimony.

Pastor Ralph
March 2007 Newsletter Column
Bethesda Baptist Church
Durham, NC